This is not an easy question. It has been brought up so many times during my sessions with clients, and my typical answer is “why would you feel comfortable?” Later DX ASD adults who have spent years oftheir lives masking or are currently not “out” as autistics find it very uncomfortable to unmask in front of people they’ve already masked with; firmly establishing that you’re a “normal” neurotypical person. It’s also difficult to imagine a life where it feels safe to stim and be yourself without the shaming you might have already experienced. So how does one become comfortable with stimming?
Comfort levels in stimming are personalized and different for each client. If the stim is quiet or not very visible, such as rolling a coin or paperclip in pocket, movements with the tongue, repeatedly rubbing fingers or thumb, twirling your hair, popping gum, etc., then stepping out and stimming in public may be easier. But what if the stim is bigger and noticeable, such as bouncing on your heels, rocking, pacing, clapping, vocalizations, rapid blinking, etc.? Unfortunately some late DX autistics may find it more difficult to become comfortable stimming in public due to the adverse feelings like shame or embarrassment. Those adverse maladaptive feelings and thought patterns are the underlying function of a person NOT stimming in public. What I mean is, the negative feelings clients may fear are based on years of hiding, being shamed, being talked down to, made fun of, and embarrassments within childhood development. In your session we will try to heal some of those feelings and discover stims that fit within your lifestyle. Then, it will become more and more comfortable to meet your stimming needs and begin feeling safe in your own body in public locations.
-Payton
